Six weeks home.

These six weeks have been just about the furthest thing from easy,

But they haven't been hard either.

There really aren't words for what these six weeks have been,

Rewarding? Exhausting? Whole? Broken? Blessed?

All of the above,

And SO worth every second.

I feel like I'm living in a fog, emotionally exhausted, from all the medical crisis and repeated disruption in our attempt to get into any kind of routine due to hospital stays. I feel like we should be in a much better routine by now, and yet there isn't much of any, outside of eat, sleep, and change diapers...and the sleep part is few and far between still.

The thing is, they are both easy kids.

Milena loves being held, she enjoys being tickled, she likes playing blocks, playing with stuffed animals, and chewing on her textured Grabber XT and Y-Chew XT.

If she's playing on the floor and hubby or I come sit on the couch, she will now stop what she is doing, get up, and climb up onto the couch with us. When she came home she would not move anywhere without being escorted, her new found independence is beautiful to witness.

On several occasions recently, someone else has been engaging with her (a hospital nurse, her primary doctor, and a family member) and she will see me and pull her hand away from them and reach for me right away.....We are so far from being attached but she definitely prefers me and knows I'm her safe person when she gets unsure.

Elijah is a more particular and cautious child, he loves to be held, but only by his people. He loves to play catch with his Oballs, playing very simple cause and effect games on the iPad, walking in his gait trainer, and [army crawl] chasing our dog.

Elijah adores Daddy, he is most definitely his safe person and crying for any reason quickly turns to smiles when he sees daddy.

He is crawling all over the place and can stay up on his hand and knees for a few minutes now, he can also sit unassisted for several minutes, which was not at all possible even for seconds, when I picked him up.

He's such an easy to please little boy overall.

It feels like they have been here forever and they fit so perfectly into our family,

It also feels like the longest six weeks of my life, because every week spent in the hospital feels like an eternity.

Milena and I had a talk though, I kindly suggested that she make her New Years Resolution be to stay out of the hospital this year! Dare I jinx it and say, so far so good, we finished the most recent round of antibiotics on the 30th for her gtube site infection and we're praying that her health is stabilizing.

I so love the holidays, but this year I am so glad that they are now behind us.

Coming home the week before Thanksgiving, then having 2 birthday in early December, Christmas, and New Years, plus 3 long hospital stays, I'm just exhausted! So ready for a hopefully calmer first half of January!